Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Backseat Blowout

Motherhood is teaching me so many things!!!  

So today was Tom's first day off, and he's working the next two days on curriculum writing, so we wanted to have a relaxing, easy day.  The only thing on my agenda was my follow-up diabetes lab at the hospital.  Otherwise, we were planning on running errands, going on a walk with the stroller, and grilling for supper.  

We got the word around 8 this morning that we had two parties interested in seeing our house TODAY!  Our house has been on the market for a while so we are always willing to show it.  Usually we have a day or two to get ready, but not this time!  Luckily our house was spotless, thanks to my hero Joyce Ann Neerhof (I call her Mom) who has come over several times since Jude was born to clean.  She's the best.  

Leaving the house for the first showing was easy -- we went over to the high school gym and Tom rebounded shots for one of the Mohawk girls while Jude and I walked.  I showed him where we sit for the girls' games and told him to get used to the's pretty much our home-away-from-home all winter long.  

I think he likes the gym!  :)

After gym time, I headed to the hospital to do my 2-hour follow up test in the lab.  Can I admit that I was looking forward to two whole hours of quiet?  I absolutely LOVE my little boy and he is my best little buddy...but I was really excited to relax, get some homework done, and have a medical excuse to be still for two hours :)  

I checked in and learned that this test is actually a fasting test, so I'd have to come back another day.  The OB nurses had told me it was just a two hour fast that I'd have to do, but it was actually an 8-12 hour fast...bummer.  I hate fasting, especially with nursing.  So, home I went.  

Our next house showing was to be from 4-5:30.  When it was time for us to leave, Jude was still nursing and wasn't finished.  Tom wanted to go to the grocery store and Ace hardware, which are in walking distance.  He went by himself and I packed Jude into his car seat and headed to find a peaceful, shady place so I could finish nursing in the car.  I thought, I'm so smart.  This is going to be just fine.  Air conditioning, music playing, plenty of space in the backseat...he'll just finish up and then go right to sleep and I can go to Kohl's or something.

Um.  I SHOULD HAVE CALLED A FRIEND.  Really.  What was I thinking?  I have many friends who would have said "come on over" and wouldn't have minded whatsoever if I sat in one of their bedrooms and nursed.  I SHOULD HAVE CALLED A FRIEND because...

...THIS little sweetheart, who hadn't pooped in 6 days (common for breastfeeding babies, apparently) got The Look. 

The Look.  Distressed.  Whimpering.  Face growing red.  Straaaaaaaiiiining.  Moms, I know you know what I'm talking about.

And then, the reason I SHOULD HAVE CALLED A FRIEND happened.  Holy. Moly.  The 6 days came to a screeching halt.  Or should I say a shooting halt??  

I didn't know such a tiny little human could be capable of such a thing.  It was EV.ER.Y.WHERE.  All I could do was sit there and hold him and just wait for it to be done, cuz it just kept happening.  I was sort of laughing and on the verge of crying at the same time.  Poor little Jude had to have been in pain.  I can't imagine anyone not being in pain in a situation like that.  He whimpered and cried, and I tried to soothe him, but....just so much yuck, everywhere.  

I am going to call Gerber and suggest they just stop making white onesies altogether.  How about a line of onesies in a nice dark brownish-yellow color?  I'd buy a bunch of them.

Anyway.  I prayed out loud and said "God, I do not know what to do here."  I think God must have been having a good laugh at this point.  I am giving Him the credit for what I was able to do next.  I grabbed the changing pad from the diaper bag and decided I would try to get a new diaper on him, use the baby wipes to clean him up the best I could, wrap him in a blanket, take him home (showing or not) and get him into the bathtub.

I took the diaper off.  That was a mistake.  Because Jude wasn't done.  

SERIOUSLY?  Was this possible?

I wonder how many baby wipes I went through trying to get him, and the changing pad, and myself, and the car seat somewhat cleaned up.  I tossed the dirty wipes into the front seat because there was nowhere else to go with them.  Wipe, toss, wipe, toss, wipe, toss...thank goodness I had a brand new pack.

I got him as clean as I possibly could, and reached for a new diaper.  Right then I felt something warm on my lap and heard a spray hitting the window behind me.

Yup.  Jude was peeing.  All over.  

I couldn't cry, because this was just too comical.  I said out loud, "Is this really happening?"  Meanwhile, my sweet little boy was feeling a LOT of relief...he had a relaxed, happy smile on his face and was about to drift off to sleep.  

At this point I had to talk myself through every step.  "Diaper, on...Bad diaper (gag), get it inside another clean one...Onesies, throw in front seat...Call to get car detailed tomorrow...Put baby inside blanket...Put baby in seat...Home."

Here he is after we arrived at home.  Still very dirty, wrapped in a blanket, barely strapped in, taking a nap and HAPPY as a clam!

I'd given Tom the heads up on the situation while I was driving home, and I told him "I don't care if people are in the house, I'm taking him in and giving him a bath."  Poor Tom begged me not to go in the house.  He was at our neighbors' house, the Garretts, and told me to come over there and bathe him instead.  I said no...I didn't want him to get anyone's bathtub or sink dirty...he was so filthy!  I saw Kris outside and bless her heart, she was willing to help, but the showing was done (thank you God) so I took our poopy little boy inside and put him in a bath.

Nice and clean.

We made it!  :)  My little prince was so worn out and could have slept for hours, but I got him clean and into some snuggly jammies.  I was so happy he was feeling better.  We cuddled and rocked and I forgot about everything else for a few hours.  

I couldn't possibly love that little person more.  

Tom made supper on the grill.  We all relaxed and watched the Tony Awards that we'd recorded on Sunday.  

Vino Vednesday will have to commence next week :)  Hopefully my little turd will be regular so we don't have a repeat story!  LOL!

Wishing you lots of joy today.  Hug your kids.  Kiss your spouse.  Thank your mother for being awesome.  :)


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